* Muhammad Riduan Ramli's Unpredictable Life * * The Single Dad (Abah) *

I have said it many times & will say it again today. Hopefully it will be my last saying of this. I promise to update my blog as often as I can. Hahaha. The same old story. Hehehe.

So now, what should I update you? I think it’s better for me to categorise things about my life. Ok, here’s how it’s going to be.

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Divorce – The Post Trauma
As much as I want it to be over, I know it will take some time to really get over it. Let’s face it. I’m afterall human being with feelings & humans don’t get over sensitive things like divorce very easily. I have acknowledged it with an open heart. In fact, it’s quite normal in our society.

One thing I know for sure now, it’s not as painful as before the first time I felt it when my ex wife dumped me in late 2008. Hahaha. It’s coming to 2 years now. So now, I’m still figuring it out on what to do for the rest of my life. I have a few personal plans but has not decided on the finalised plan. I will reveal the plans later maybe on my next update.

That’s all for I have on the Divorce section. I’m not fully recovered from it. There are still some pain left in me but I’m coping well with it at the moment.

The Precious Child – Aria Sheza
Well, I’m sure most of you would have known how I adore my little daughter. I love her so much that I feel I will die if anything is to happen to her. A father’s love for his child is unmeasurable by any known measuring instruments. That’s how deep I love my kiddo.

The fact that I see her only on weekends doesn’t help reducing my mental stress I’m experiencing daily. Life do has its way of  balancing happiness & sadness. It’s feel strange sometimes.

The joy of seeing my daughter on weekends is beyond normal happiness. The short time I have with her break me hard without fail. I love to hug & kiss her all the time during this short time for fear of parting is nearing every single seconds that are passing.

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I miss my daughter Sheza so much that I decided to visit her today at my ex-wife parent’s place. When I reach there, almost everyone is at home. My ex-father in law, ex-sister in law, my ex-wife & Sheza is at home. Only my ex-mother in law is not at home as she is working late. We greet each other. I do miss them too as it has been a while that I see them.

Sheza had just finish her bath & was changing to her pyjamas in my ex-wife’s room. I sat on the sofa waiting for Sheza to come out. I heard she shouted “Abah.. Abah.. Abah..” a few minutes later because earlier in the room her mommy told her that I was coming to visit her. She was so excited shouting for me without realising that I was actually beside her.

I call for her & she finally realised I was beside her when she turn her head to her left. She become more excited than before & kiss my right hand showing her respect to me. She then hug me & I kiss her forehead. Her face is full of white powder like those chinese opera people. Hahaha. Thanks to her mommy that her face is so white! I really miss my cutie pie a lot. I bought for her a Mickey Mouse ClubHouse colouring book. Sheza love Mickey mouse & she was delighted when I showed it to her. Her face glow.

I went to her room to spend time with her. To my surprise, Sheza’s vocabulary is getting bigger. She showed me shapes & say it out loud. I’m not talking about simple shapes like triangle, square, rectangle, circle. She mastered that long ago. I’m talking about semi-circles, crescent, oval etc.. Oh my god, she really can recognise the shapes!!

She even memorise the doa/prayer for sleeping! For her age, she has done well for herself. I really have to thank her mommy for teaching her all the words & doa. I have always know her mommy to be a good teacher. She always know how to induce interest in kid’s learning experience. She was an ex MOE teacher & for that I’m very greatful that she can teach Sheza very well.

We continue playing with each other via acting, making funny sounds, watch videos from my mobile phone & so on. It was definitely so much fun with her around. She never stop making me laugh & smile. I was happy seeing her happy & having fun with me. Times up! I did not even feel it & it’s already 1.5 hours gone. It’s time for her sleep. The clock reads 9.30pm.

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